Let's talk...Sex

Ah...I got your attention didn't I?

Well, it's not all about sex, but some of it is...so just keep reading.

Yesterday I attended my marriage and family relations class for the second time. 'Bout half way through our 2 1/2 hour class I began to get really tired of hearing "the wife lecture".

Apparently, according to my teacher, wives could stop any and all divorces if they would just do 3 simple things. Which are...

1. Show your husband respect.

2. Stop nagging.

3. And give him sex.

(3 times a week or more for a healthy marriage, just in case you were wondering)

I nearly blew a gasket. 

 But Instead I simply asked, with all the calmness I could muster, why the heck she wasn't giving the same lecture to the husbands?

Next came a very lively discussion about sex, marriage, and other such things.

From here on out I will attempt to eliminate my sarcasm. I do believe this is a very serious topic, not to be taken lightly. I can't promise to be completely good, but I will try.

My teachers name is Larinda, she is passionate about marriage and keeping people married. I can relate to that. I feel the same way.

This is her soapbox in a nut shell...

She contends, that as women we have so much power and control over our relationships that if we would just do the very simple things listed above that our husbands would naturally be better husbands. 

Hmmm...I can see her point, to some degree at least.

I agree that women have the power the tear down or build up their husbands. I agree that nagging is not the best way to get your husbands to get to that list of "honey-do's". And I agree that husbands/wives need to feel the closeness that can only be shared by having sex.

By the way...I hate the word sex, it sounds cheap. For the purpose of this discussion it's the easiest choice of word. Sorry.

Back to my thought...

I get what she's saying. It makes sense. But don't you think it's sounds a little lop-sided? How 'bout a little mutual respect? How 'bout a little pat on the back? How 'bout a little romance? Well, apparently we could have all those things too, IF women weren't such poor communicators. Oh see, there goes the sarcasm, it just slipped out. Apparently, not getting what we want out of our husbands is our fault too.

*Disclaimer*

My husband is stinkin' awesome. Seriously. I have no room to complain. And I am not. He is nearly perfect. I must be one incredibly powerful women...wink, wink.

 Larinda also claims that women expect way too much from their husbands, while men don't really expect that much from their wives. If women would just expect less, we'd all be happier. Her example...As a woman, she falls short of her own expectations of herself, so how could she possibly expect her husband to meet all of her expectations? He is bound to fall short as well.

I agree. Women do often times have high and unrealistic expectations, we do need to cut our husbands some slack. But is it realistic to not expect anything? Only to serve him, and give him sex on demand?  I think not.

Obviously, I have a poor attitude. Not about marriage. Marriage is awesome and I feel incredible blessed to have the husband I do. But I'm not sure I'm completely sold on "the wife lecture".

So what do YOU think?

Do you think...respect, no nagging, and sex is the key to solving the over 50% divorce rate in this country? In all seriousness, I do think there is a lot of truth to this theory. I do think women have a huge influence for good or bad on a relationship. I do think that building up is always better then tearing down. I do think that sex is a very important part of a healthy marital relationship, but certainly not the cure-all.

I want to hear from you...even you "quiet read but never comment readers"...I know you're out there. Speak up. Is this the magic formula to save all marriages? Or just a recipe for really happy, lazy husbands?

What'cha thinkin'?