The Basement-Not Finished...but Close!

We have been working on texturing and painting the basement for the past month. I know we're slow. Here is the progress....but first lets start from the beginning.

This is what the basement looked like 6 months ago on the day we moved in. The wallpaper is gray with blue dots, the border is blue mallard ducks. The carpet is gray which we chose not to change since it is in good shape and we don't have alot of moola. So gray carpet is what we had to work around.

This is the day the ducks came down.

Ken installed new recessed lighting above where the TV will go. He added a few new outlets and switches, and a light for underneath the stairs.

We textured the upper part of the wall where we removed the wallpaper. It was a bigger job than we were expecting. But finally we were ready to paint. I wanted a country red and tan, but that would not go well with the carpet so we went with greens.

We still need to finish the outlet covers, get new blinds, put up curtains to the furnace closet, put up the pool table light, and decorate, but here it is so far...

This is just as you come down the stairs. I want to put a mirror above the bar. And a large picture above the couch.

This is from the opposite corner. We have been having fun with the new Wii.Another view...

This is the treadmill corner.

Here's the dart board...opposite the treadmill.Ta-dah! That's it.

Oh, I forgot...We also replaced some of our 70's light fixtures upstairs. When we bought our new couches last week I found these lights on clearance.

Here's the old...

Here are the new...This one hangs in the kitchen, above the dining area. This one is in the entry just as you walk in the front door. I think they are a tad cutie than what we had.

Okay, now I'm done. That's it.

Father and Son

I was looking through a scrapbook yesterday and came across some of my favorite pictures. These were taken a few years ago by my friend Tyra. I think she captured the love that this father and son share.
I love these pictures. Thanks Tyra!

I Used To Be Able To...

I used to be able to manage a house full of little ones, be pregnant, be the Primary President, be the Room-mom, volunteer on the PTA, go to play groups, keep a clean house, visit friends, do my visiting teaching, and do it all at the same time with a smile on my face.....I can't anymore. I'm TIRED. Of course some of these things I can't illiminate, nor would I want to. But over the last few years I have had to learn to say, "NO". That word has just about killed me in the past. The thought of telling someone NO gave me huge anxiety. I dreaded it, and rarely did I ever say NO.

After #5 turned about 18 months old my hectic yet peaceful world came crashing down. At that point everything outside of keeping that child from disaster became less of a priority. It took nearly all my time and energy making sure #5 didn't hurt himself, someone else, or anything that he came in contact with. Everything became a monumental task, even the simple things I used to do with ease. Nothing was easy anymore. I started having to say, NO just out of pure necessity. I just couldn't do what I used to be able to do.

Over the next few years I began to lose myself. I stopped hanging with friends because #5 couldn't play nice. I stopped going places because everything became a fight, a tantrum, or just pain out of control. I stopped doing a lot of the things that made me happy because anytime I turned my back disaster struck. I began to feel trapped and even resentful that this child that I loved dearly and fiercely defended was taking so much from me. At this same time Ken and I had a role reversal in our church callings. I was released from my calling that got me out of the house once a week with no kids. And he took my place being away from home. He got called to the Bishopric and I got put in cold storage, or so it felt. It was a blessing and a curse. I didn't feel like I could do more, yet I NEEDED more of something. More time to myself, more quiet, more social interaction without chasing babies, more than just cooking, cleaning and changing diapers. But I never felt like a could very safely leave #5 in the hands of anyone else. No one else could keep a good enough eye on him, no one else cared for him like I did, no one else could handle the power struggles. During this time anxiety and depression knew me well. It was a lonely time. I rarely felt like I could take in a full breathe of air. A feeling of suffocation always lingered near.

Life hasn't stopped since that time. I have had two babies since then. Life never stops, but slowly for me it has gotten better. Why? Because #5 isn't so difficult anymore. I am still in survival mode most of the time, but it is different. For the most part the clouds have lifted. I don't like anxiety or depression, I fight them everyday. Not because life is terrible, but because they are in my genes. I think it will be a struggle for the rest of my life. But I will win. I always do eventually.

Life is good, I am so blessed. I can see blessing all around me. There was a time when I felt so alone that I couldn't even feel my Father in Heavens love for me. I felt abandoned. But I truly know that was not the case. He was always with me. However, he knows what we need to make us stronger. I needed to need Him. To learn to rely on Him, to pray and ask for help. For so long I thought I could do anything and everything by myself, I didn't need anyone. People disappoint. I didn't want to rely on anyone, even my Savior. (How dumb I was) Having #5 taught me that I can't do things alone. I need help sometimes. I especially need my Savior. He never disappoints, even when the answer to prayer sounds like a NO. It's usually just WAIT, I have something better in mind. When life crashed down on me, He picked me up, only after I learned what I needed to know. Thank heavens for trials, and little #5's who teach me great things.

I really don't know why I decided to go down this road today. I didn't know I was going to. Like I said, I am tired. I have had two nights with little sleep and I think I just needed to talk. Thanks for listening.

BBQing in the Snow

Last night we had a "Good Grades" celebration. We met with the kids teachers last Thursday for parent teacher conferences, and each of them are doing so well. I can't afford to pay them for good grades, but I wanted them to know that Dad and I appreciate their hard work. So we had a celebration dinner. I let them choose the menu, which was BBQ-ed hamburger and hotdogs with all the fixings. It wasn't snowing when we planned the menu, but it sure was when dinner time can around. Oh well, no worries. It was fun. Later we decorated sugar cookies.

I forgot to mention that Sydney's science fair project that she started two days before it was due made it to the district science fair. She was so excited. She didn't make it past district, I could tell she was slightly disappointed, but she took it very well. She was proud of herself, and we were very proud of her as well.

Little D's First Cold

Daric is nearly 4 months old. He has been so healthy, not even a little sniffle until yesterday. Now he has a nasty cough and cold. He is miserable. Poor little guy. I know we've been through this a hundred times with all the kids, but still it breaks my heart. I want him to be all better.

This picture was taken last week when he was feeling fine. Isn't he CUTE!

Man I love this little guy!

Random Photo Tag

Here are the rules of the game:

1. Go to your my documents/my pictures

2. Go to your sixth file

3. Go to your sixth picture

4. Blog about it

5. Tag six people

This is a picture of Ken in the hospital room while I was in labor with Daric. I was still in the early stages of being induced. We had been in the hospital for about 3 hours and I think the boredom began to sink in. I could be wrong on this, but I think that is homework. He could be reading the back of my novel, but more often than not he has been known to be finishing an assignment or studying for a test while we await the arrival of our newest bundle of joy.

Okay, I tag Shelly, Tyra, Kari, Ruth, Heather, and Julianna.