Have you ever watched parents who have older and younger children? Have you ever noticed how some parents seem to be so much more LAZY with their younger children then they were when their older children were young?
I have...and I swore I would never be one of those parents. I never wanted to be a lazy parent who didn't put in as much effort with my younger children as I once had.
Well guess what...it's happened.
But! Now that I'm here I understand a little better.
It's taken some time to convince myself, because mommy guilt is a powerful force, but I am NOT lazy. Never have been!
I do not sit around eating bon-bons and watching soap operas all day (gag me, please).
True my younger ones don't get all the bells and whistles that my older kids got at that age.
True I did send #5 & 6 to preschool not knowing their ABC's. It's true, shocking I know. I would have been in hysterics wondering how I had failed so miserably as a parent if #1 didn't meet and exceed every developmental milestone. But I've come to realize it just doesn't matter.
Sort of...
I mean really it doesn't matter, but I still let things like that bother me.
I feel guilty because I'm not as involved as I once was. There is only so much of me to go around. I am spread pretty darn thin, and still some days it just doesn't cover EVERYTHING.
I feel guilty because I LOATHE filling out my kids reading calendars. Six different papers, charts, and what-not everyday drives me crazy!
I have a mental block when it comes to school papers and again I feel GUILTY.
My brain can only hold so much information and having 5 kids in elementary school and 1 in Junior High gives me system OVERLOAD.
So I deal with it by ignoring as much as I can.
I know that sounds terrible, but it's SURVIVAL.
Here was my latest dilemma...
CLASS VALENTINE'S....
Between my 5 elementary age students I needed to provide 123 valentines for their fellow classmates.
I was seriously sweating this because I didn't have the money to go buy 6 boxes of valentine goodies. I would rather spend that money on my own little family of valentines. But can you imagine being the one kid in your class that did not bring a valentine to share with their buddies.
Ultimate humiliation.
That would have put me on the crappy mommy list for sure.
I had no choice but to figure out a cheap way to make my kids happy, and stay off that list.
I ended up bypassing all of the cutesie Valentine's Day packaged candy and going right for the cheapest bulk candy bag I could find. I ended up spending $4.00 on smarties rather than $16.00 on traditional valentine favors.
Did I feel guilty? YES, I did for a moment. But only for a moment, because even though I did not spend tons of money, nor did I spend several evenings making sure that every child had there classmates name written on their cards. It DIDN'T matter. My kids were happy, it was cheap and easy, and it's all okay.
I don't know if anyone else can relate too trying to live up to what you USED to be able to do. I hope I'm not the only one that feels this way. But DUH, hello! I didn't use to have 8 kids! Not that it matters how many kids you have, ANY number is challenging at times. I do WAY more now than I did when my older kids were young, it only seems like less because it's spread out a lot more.
It's all good.
My kids are surviving.
And I am trying my hardest to do the things that really matter and not sweat the small stuff.
Cause really...if it won't matter years from now then it's not worth worrying about today.
Sometimes less is more. Sometimes.
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